No More Work Drama!

Published March 27, 2014 by surannyp

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Gossiping, backstabbing, bullying and complaining co-workers will ensnare even the best employees into their unhappy world of drama and deceit. In so doing, problem employees transform otherwise efficient, benign corporate environments into tawdry scenes from Ally McBeal, The Office, House or any number of comedy shows poking fun at the dysfunctional American workplace.

In the real world, though, office drama isn’t funny. It creates stress, drains employees of energy and hampers productivity. To address these conflicts, managers and individual co-workers need to understand the “drama type” of employees creating this toxic work environment, says Kaley Klemp, co-author of The Drama-Free Office: A Guide to Healthy Collaboration with Your Team, Coworkers, and Boss.

The four primary “drama types” as described by Klemp, who is also a leadership and teambuilding coach, include: complainers, cynics, controllers and caretakers. Knowing how to handle each of these types of people will help you ward off thorny, stressful situations that could jeopardize your career.

I think I have worked with just about every drama type. The complainer, who has nothing better to do but bitch about other people, thier work habits and ethics, thier job performance and skills. They don’t have time to get thier work done, because they are so preoccupied with what others are doing. The last hospital I was employed at had so many of these drama queen types. Everyday I woke up and was scheduled to go into work, I would get physically ill. I dreaded the fact that I had to go in there and deal with fake ass bitches, who would smile in your face, and tear you apart behind your back. Them chicks couldnt’t keep it real with themselves or others if thier lives depended on it. I guess I could categorize them as the cynics. I’m sorry, but I can’t fake the funk. If I don’t like you, you will know it, and if you don’t know it, then you are just dumb. I can’t sit up in someone’s face that I don’t vibe with and have a conversation about your life, because I don’t really care. I don’t want to hear about your day, because it doesn’t concern me or affect me. If I have to talk to you about work, then I am mature and professional enough to set my feelings aside and get the issue resolved, but if it’s not about money, than it just doesn’t make sense to entertain you. Our biggest problem at my old hospital was favoritism. The complainers and cynics were in that favorite group of people, therefore they felt empowered and at liberty to go into the supervisor’s office all day and night and complain about people that were actually hard workers and could run circles around them. I worked with a bunch of slow, lazy ass people, I would do ten sticks to thier two. People that have been doing this longer than me and get so frazzled and overwhelmed when they see that there are more than 3 sticks that need to be collected. These people drown in a cup of water, they are so pathetic. We had the controllers who would be so worried about your specimen, the way it was collected, the way it was packaged and sent to the lab, and how much was actually in the tube. They would be so worried about your sticks, meanwhile their workload was piling up.

Our biggest problem, not only in the phlebotomy department, but hospital wide, was management. My old supervisor was such a good for nothing, worthless piece of shit. She had her favorite group of people and would only listen to and cater to them. She did not like me one bit, because I wouldn’t take her shit. I don’t care who you are or what your position is, don’t be rude and disrespectful and think that I’m not going to react and comeback at you the same way. She had an issue with the fact that I spoke my mind, had an opinion, and just would not back down. Anybody that didn’t agree with her rule of it’s my way or the highway was on her shit list, and my name was right on the top of the list. We had a senior tech who was assigned to make up the schedule and was supposed to be there to help us out with anyhing we needed. I’m pretty sure her and the supervisor were lovers, because nobody in the department would get away with the type of things this chick did. She was the only one that did not have to work any weekends or holidays. She could take paid time off whenever she damn well pleased. Only 2 people could be out on pto at a time and even tho she didn’t work weekends or holidays she would always take pto for the days before and after, therefore if omeone who actually worked Christmas for example, and wanted to spend Christmas eve with thier family couldn’t because she had already took pto herself. She was always in the main lab, rarely if ever came over to collecting to see if we needed help, but would have herself on the schedule for phlebotomy. She also had her crew of favorites, and she would let people leave work in the middle of the shift to go take care of business and cover for them by not marking it on their time cards.

Human resources at that hospital was the most corrupt department of them all. You would go to human resources and speak to them about what was happening at your department and they would basically laugh at you, and turn shit around on you. They would say that you have to go through this bullshit ass chain of command, and that was totally pointless. I’m so glad to be out of that place and away from those people. I am at a new hospital now, and trust me when I tell you, it’s not that much of a diffrence. My current supervisor is nothing like my old one. She is caring, fair and respectable, but too bad I can’t say the same about the workers. There are some lazy ass people here too, they avoid work, take forever with one patient, sit on the computer looking at bullshit and pretend they don’t see or hear the work that needs to be done. After this hospital, I am not going to work at another hospital, ever! I can’t work with so many personalities and attitudes. I don’t want to be around sick people all damn day and night. I don’t want to sacrifice my holidays and weekends anymore. I just want to work in an outside lab where I work morning hours and can be home by a decent time. I can be responsible for registering my patients and collecting their blood, that they voluntarily walked into donate. I don’t have to be around sick people and and work with patients that have been stuck a million times while in the hospital. A drama free work place! I would love to hear from any of you that have been in a similiar situation. Have you worked with these type of people? Have you worked in this type of environment? How did you hanndle it? or what would you do? As always comments and feedback are greatly appreciated and welcomed. Until next time be safe and stay healthy.

Suranny P.

Love vs. Money

Published March 5, 2014 by surannyp

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Little girls fall for looks and swag. Basic bitches fall for money. Real women fall for love and loyalty.

Is money, power, and respect really the key to life? What ever happened to love, family, and God? So many people beleive that money rules the world, and in many circumstances I would have to agree, I mean, I can’t pay my mortgage with love, nor do I want to get paid for my hard work in hugs and affection. I understand that money is very important, however, it is not the most valuable thing in the world. In my last blog I questioned whether I should follow my heart and take a paycut, but do something I am passionate about, or continue in my current field, although I wake up everyday wishing I didn’t have to come in to work, or spend my whole shift looking at my watch wondering how much longer until I can clock out and go home. When it comes to money and happiness, I tend to find it a little harder to decide which is more important to me, but when it comes to money and love, there is just no comparison.

As a teenager I was so concerned with material things. I needed the hottest sneakers and boots, the trendiest clothes, and the most expensive jewelry. I only dated men with money, because they could provide me with everything and anything I wanted and/or asked for. These men weren’t doctors or lawyers, they were young guys who made money the fast and illegal way. I had the time of my life. From fancy dinners to elaborate gifts. I would have more cash in my pockets at 15 than I do now at 34. They drove nice, expensive cars and would pick me up and drop me off wherever I needed to go. I was dating two diffrent guys at the time, so what the one guy couldn’t get or do for me, the other one would. I was so spoiled, and dumb. I actually thought these guys cared about me, I mean why else would they spend money on me? The thing about men with money is that they are so used to getting females to fall for them, and do whatever they ask of them. The money comes so easy to them, that they have no problem spending it on many diffrent woemen. I cared about both of these guys a great deal, but fell in love with one of them. I decided to be a mature woman about the situation, therefore I knew that I had to stop dating both of these guys, and try to build a relationship with the man I thought I loved. The moment I told this guy how I felt about him, and that I wanted to be in a relationship with him, was the moment I found out about all the other women, including his wife and kids. His solution was that we could continue to date and I could continue to enjoy all the benefits that he supplied me with. I had to be okay with the fact that I was sharing him, and couldn’t or shouldn’t want to complain, since he always made me happy by giving me such nice things. That ladies and gentleman was the last time I ever saw or spoke to him again. I was heart-broken and humiliated, but learned a very important lesson that day, I was not going to let another man buy my love.

So many women stay in relationships with men, because of what these men can do for them. They don’t care if they have to share thier men with other women, or if they are mistreated, as long as thier men are suppling them financially. An old friend of mine was in a relationship with this man, he was a big time drug dealer. This man was the sole provider of the household, he took care of her and her two kids. He bought her a house, a car, and he would give her an allowance weekly to buy clothes and necessities for her and her kids. My friend didn’t work, she didn’t do housework, because he got her a maid service. She did not have to worry about picking up the kids for school and doing activities with them, because he got her a nanny. Her only job was to pamper herself, and keep herself looking nice for her man. My friend knew that her man was cheating on her with other women, she knew that not only was he selling drugs, he was also using them, and she also knew that when he would come home after staying out of the house for several days, if she tried to question him, he would beat her ass. To the outside world my friend had it made. She was living the life that all women wanted and envied, but to those that knew the real truth, it was just shocking and unbelievable. She would talk to me about her situation, and I would advise her that it wasn’t worth staying. I told her she should get a job and start saving her money, pack up all her stuff and her kids things and just move out. On those days when she was crying on my shoulder, and I was helping her cover the bruises on her face and body, she would agree and say that she would do just that, but then she would realize that she had no skills to do any kind of job. She knew she could stay with her mom, but that would mean that she would have to go out into the real world and do what real people do. So she stayed, and the abuse continued and got even worse.

We grew apart because her man told her she could no longer be friends with me. He just knew I was feeding her lies, and that I was just jelouse of what she had, and she started to believe him. Today, I have no idea how she is, if she is still with him, or if she is even still alive. I watch these reality shows and see these women that are married or dating these basketball players and celebrities, and they admit on national television how they know that their men are cheating, but that is what a man does, and that as long as they don’t know about it it’s okay. Really? This is what regular girls sitting at home are watching and learning. Ladies what are you willing to put up with for money? Would you share your man if he was providing you with the lifestyle you’ve always wanted? Could you be able to be a stay at home trophy wife and have no money of your own, or anything in your name? If I asked would you prefer love over money, what would be your answer? I would love to hear from you all on this topic. As always feedback welcomed, and greatly appreciated. Until next time, be safe and stay healthy.

SurannyP.

Money vs. Happiness

Published March 4, 2014 by surannyp

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“If you’re a happy person, you will probably be even happier with more money, but if you are an unhappy person, no amount of money will change that. Make happiness your goal. Let the money take care of itself.” by Valerie Alexander, Huffington Post.

This topic is very near and dear to me, as it describes my current situation. I am currently employed in a hospital as a phlebotomist, for those of you that don’t know what that means, it simply means I collect blood specimen from patients of all ages using a venipuncture technique. As you all can imagine us phlebotomist’s are the most disliked people in the hospital, but one of the most important teams. We are the essential link to a patient’s healthcare and well being. Without us, doctors would have no idea what’s going on with your health or what steps have to be taken in order to improve it. Being a phlebotomist is not a hard job, we identify our patient, gather our supplies, insert a needle into a vein, fill and invert our tubes, label each tube and collect our work, and finally bag our specimen and send it to the lab for processing, piece of cake right?

Wrong! Every now and then we get an easy patient that will allow us to go into their room and complete the steps above, no questions asked, no sarcastic comments made, and those my friends are rare and few. Imagine walking into a patient’s room and before you can open your mouth to say hello and introduce yourself, they are already whining and complaining about blood work again? Here comes the vampire. What do you do with all my blood? I’m a hard stick so good luck. You get one shot! And my favorite, nobody can ever get blood from me so you won’t be able to get any either.

First of all, no I’m not a vampire! My name is Suranny and I am a phlebotomist. What do you think I’m doing with your blood, selling it for top dollar to the highest bidder, or do you really think I am a vampire and have a home full of hungry vampires waiting for me to get home so they can feast on your delicious blood. I am an experienced phlebotomist who has been doing this for 6+ years, so please let me take a look at your arm so I can determine if you are truly a difficult stick, which 9 out of 10x you are not. The people that tend to tell you how hard they are to get blood from the minute you walk into their room are usually the ones with pipelines. I understand how you feel, trust me, we try our best to save you guys sticks. Maybe, just maybe you are really not as hard as you were led to believe. Lastly, you say I only have one shot, that’s my goal each and every single time. I don’t know why some patients think that we want to miss the site, and have to redirect or start all over again, when the fact is that we just want to get our specimen, and get the hell out of your room as soon as possible, so that we aren’t anymore exposed to whatever it is that you have, that brought you in here in the first place.

I am currently in school for culinary arts, I know it’s weird. I went from healthcare to culinary, like one extreme to the next. I thought I wanted to be a nurse, but after working in 2 different hospitals and seeing how miserable some nurses are, there is no way I want to go through school for 2-4 years, just to do a job that I hate everyday. Don’t get me wrong, the money is good, and I have met quite a few nurses out there who absolutely love their job and look forward to coming to work everyday, but honestly I think the miserable ones that I’ve met, have the happy ones outnumbered. Which brought me to this subject.

I have been looking for a job in the bakery field, because my favorite part of culinary, is pastry arts. However, when you are starting out with no previous experience, right out of school or if you’re still enrolled in the program, chances are your pay scale is not going to be the greatest. So here is my dilemma, do I take a pay cut and follow my dreams and aspirations, or do I stay where I am at, and try to further my skills in the healthcare field? Let me set the record straight, for all the nasty, disgusting and vial shit that we as phlebotomist get exposed to, our wages are a joke. I don’t plan or intend on being rich, or even middle-class on a phlebotomy salary, but should I follow my heart and live beyond my means? Should I struggle to make ends meet, in hopes that once I get the experience and exposure that I need to further myself up the ladder of success, it would all have been worth it at the end? Do I stay where I’m at and continue to be comfortable, or do I risk it all and follow my heart?

This is true indeed the battle of money vs. happiness. Can anyone out there relate to my story? Are you currently facing a difficult decision about making more money and hating every minute of your time at work, or taking a pay cut and being truly happy and loving what you do every single day? I would love to hear from any and all of you who are in my shoes at this moment, or were dealt this hand in the past. I would really appreciate some feedback and your opinions on my situation. Hope to hear from you soon, until then be safe and stay healthy.

SurannyP.

Sexless And The City

Published February 27, 2014 by surannyp

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They say men reach thier sexual peak between the age of 18-22, and women reach thier sexual peak between the age of 35-40. I am 34 years old and I can honestly say that I have a pretty normal sexual appetite. I would be content with having sexual relations with my partner anywhere from 3-4 times a week. I have been with my man for 8 years and at the beginning we were having sex just about everyday of the week, sometimes 2-3 times a day. A couple of years later our sexual encounters went down to about 4-5 days a week, about once a day. At the present time we get sexually involved about 1-2 times a week, if that. Ladies, what is your ideal sexual goal?

About 3 months ago my man started having some sexual difficulties, he was unable to keep an erection. He is on medications for high blood pressure, and at first we thought maybe that was the reason why he was having these problems. He googled the meds he was taking and read that they do cause sexual dysfuntion, so he went to his family doctor and was prescribed some Viagra. Because my man is only 33 years old the doctor advised him to take only half the pill about 30 minutes before intercourse, and it seemed to be working just fine. The doctor was only able to give him 3 free pills and the rest he had to pay for out of pocket. As some of you may know Viagra pills are very expensive, therefore my man was not able to get anymore once he was done with the ones the doctor gave him. A short time after all this happened my boyfriend was experiencing weakness on his left side and went to the emergency room to be seen, He was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. We now know the reason for his sexual dysfunction had nothing to do with his medications, but it is one of the symptoms of MS. They started him on steriods injections to treat the muscle spasms and to help him gain back his muscle strength, and boy oh boy did it strengthen his muscle! His penis was rock hard and it would stay hard for hours on end, so ya know we was getting it in every spare moment we got and making up for those few months we went without it.  Ladies, how long would you be able to go without having any sexual relations with your partner? What options would you be willing to try to make it work?

So here are a few situations that some of my friends are going through currently. My one friend has been in a long distance relationship with her boyffriend for 10+ years, although they are not that far from each other they only see each other about once or twice a month. She is in her sexual peak and lets just say that once or twice a month is just simply not enough for her. She tells me that she would like to see her boyfriend more often, but with her work schedule and him going through mood swings and complaining of being tired all the time, that is just not possible. He does not want to move to where she lives and she has a teenage daughter who is on her last year of high school and she is hoping that once her daughter graduates and goes off to college that she will probably move to where he lives. They really haven’t been getting along too well lately, mostly because of his attitude and insecurities, so sometimes when they do see each other they end up getting into arguments and neither one of them are in the mood for sex anymore. Long story short, my friend is considering having a sex buddy close to home. Ladies, would you consider being in a long distance relationship? How long would you be able to go without seeing your partner? Would you consider having a sex buddy close to home if you were in a long distance relationship?

Another friend of mine has been in a relationship with her boyfriend for a few months. He recently found out that he had contracted an std from a previous girlfriend and so my friend went and got herself tested as well. Turns out that she also contracted the std because they weree having unprotected sex. They decided to work it out, stay together and build a stronger bond since they both share something that unfortunaetly they can’t change. With all the stress that they are going through in dealing with this situation in their lives, the fact that they are both taking oral medications to treat and supress future outbreaks, and dealing with current outbreaks, you can all just imagine how much sex is lacking there. I spoke with her today and she said she doesn’t know if she will be able to go through it with him, because she is horny all the time but he’s self concious about the std and is experiencing outbreaks, so he is currently not feeling very sexual. Ladies, what would you do if you found out a guy you were involved with got diagnosed with an std? What would you do if you got tested and found out you were also positive for this std? Would you stick it out with your partner or would you call it quits? If you decide to stay with your partner, how would this affect your relationship and sexual activities in the future?

These are just a few examples of situations that are going on around me and my circle, but I’m sure that there are worst stories and even more horrible circumstances in other relationships out there. I would love to hear from all you ladies, and gentlemen on this topic. Please share your stories with me, post your comments and ideas and help me help out many women out there who are going through something like this. Let’s be each other’s support system! Some people think they are the only ones going through something and it really helps to know that there are other people out there with the same problems. Hope to hear from you soon, and until next time, be safe and stay healthy.

SurannyP.